Somewhere Between Concern and Panic

1/31/2012:  11:31 AM

We have been enjoying this long stretch of good weather and great health.

Davis continues to feel pretty awesome, and we have had no fevers. He did, however, start complaining of a headache and a little bit of dizziness, which leads us to believe that his red blood cell count is low. As of this morning, he felt fine. I told him to call and we would run over to the hospital to get a CBC if the symptoms came back. He is scheduled for a CBC (complete blood count) and CMP (complete metabolic panel) tomorrow; I guess we will find out then. His blood draw tomorrow will determine if he will have chemo on Friday. If he doesn't make counts, it will be postponed for yet another week.

Annakate told us this weekend that she found a lump on the side of her neck. Kyle and I checked it out, and sure enough there was a swollen lymph node of the right side of her neck. If you remember, Davis had one - just one- swollen lymph node on the left side of his neck for weeks before he started exhibiting other signs. I can't speak for Kyle (but I am pretty sure he felt the same), but old-fashioned fear immediately kicked in. All of the memories and feelings that we felt with Davis back in May came flooding back. But it was worse, because in May, we were ignorant and naive to warning signs of Davis' cancer. I have always found worrying to be counterproductive and bad for one's health, so I try not to partake, but it has been a battle to keep worry at bay. One child in 1000 is diagnosed with Leukemia, so the odds of Annakate having it are very, very rare, but with that being said, she is at a 2-4% higher risk because of Davis.

The doctor comforted us some. Annakate has had several ear infections over the last few months. The swollen lymph node is probably a result of fighting off infection after infection. The doctor checked all of Annakate's other lymph nodes, and there is nothing that would indicate alarm. We are just going to keep an eye on it for a couple of weeks. I am sure with time and prayer it will go away. 99.9% of the time, it is nothing; and I am sure this is the case here. I hope. The doctor is very agressive if she feels there is something wrong, and she understands our near psychosis about our children's health. I will say, it took all I had in me to hold back the tears when she said, "We'll just keep an eye on it."

Bottomline: It's probably nothing, and God is good.

As for Davis and treatment, we are at the mercy of his ANC. From what we have learned about ANCs, there is little that can be done to manipulate them. (ANC stands for absolute neutrophil count and is basically the immune system.) He needs to have an ANC over 750 to move forward with treatment; however, his body is so worn down from undergoing seven months of chemo, the counts aren't bouncing back like they used it. In a way, this is a good thing. We know that his body hasn't become resilient to the chemo. The doctor reminded us yesterday that the chemo is doing its job. It's killing all of the cancer cells, and in order to do that, it kills a lot of the good cells too.

Back in July, four days after Davis was diagnosed, we were given a roommate who had a tumor in his chest. He was just a couple of months older than Davis. We were blessed enough to form a friendship with Jordan and his family. My heart ached for Jordan's parents because where they were when we met them was where we were five days before: pre-diagnosis - the time when there are so many questions and there are very few answers, and everyone (the doctors and nurses) are extremely tight-lipped. Jordan was diagnosed with Non-Hodgkin's Lymphoma (the cousin to Leukemia). Anyway, I bring this up becauseJordan received a PET scan yesterday to determine if he is completely cancer-free. He has already finished all of his chemo and has even rang the bell. (a big deal in cancer land. When one finishes all cancer treatment, the person gets to ring the bell. There are cheers, celebrations, partying galore. I now rank the sound of the bell as one of the best sounds in all the world, right below my babies' first cries and the sounds of their laughter.) I know you don't know him, but if you could pass along some positive thoughts and prayers on behalf of Jordan and his family, I know they would greatly appreciate it.

I am attaching a link of a recent story done on Jordan. Feel free to check it out.

Recent News Story on Jordan

We ask that you continue to remember our family in your thoughts and prayers. Please remember Annakate. Although she is not sick and the swollen lymph node is probably nothing, I am sure that the thought of what it might be weighs heavy on her. Sometimes I forget that she has been forever changed because of cancer too. And we are also grateful for your concern, encouragement, thoughts, and prayers.

Opportunities to find deeper powers within ourselves come when life seems most challenging. Joseph Campbell

The struggle of life is one of our greatest blessings. It makes us patient, sensitive, and Godlike. It teaches us that although the world is full of suffering, it is also full of the overcoming of it.
Helen Keller

Saturday night visit from a small fraction of the Meyer family. They surprised us with
their newest edition (Cody's). Annakate fell in love with Riley, the puppy. I am sure
I would have too, but Annakate monopolized puppy time.

We will keep you posted.